So here’s the thing. When it comes to movie reviews, the reason they take as long as they do is because I need to decide what’s worth talking about and how to word what I want to say correctly. But sometimes there are certain movies where I feel like I don’t have enough to talk about and thus I can’t do a full review. Yes, I have done things like the review for the first xXx movie where I just posted a link to a video of people snoring, but you know what they say. A picture says a thousand words. My thoughts on the film were summed up in the video and the context of it, if that makes sense. So every once in a while when films I’ve seen but haven’t reviewed build up, I’ll do one of these where I do a quick mini reviews of said movies I haven’t reviewed. Also, since these are meant to be quick, I won’t do rating puns. With that said, let’s begin.
Hail Caesar!- Barely any of the jokes landed and it felt like a really slow burn. The story lacked focus, or at least the focus was clear enough to follow what was going on. I expected better from the cast and directors. I love movies centered around how movie productions were made in this time period, but overall, it was just boring. The only good parts were the ones with Alden Ehrenreich’s character. 2.5/5
Justice League vs. Teen Titans- Animation was fine and the voice acting was good, but kind of a downgrade compared to a lot of the other DC Animated movies. Also, not enough of the two teams fighting to justify the title. Say what you want about BVS not having a lot of Batman and Superman actually fighting, but at least there was build up to the fight and said fight lasted a little while. They should’ve called it Justice League/Teen Titans: The Trigon Imperative or something. 3/5
Gods of Egypt- I’m not necessarily saying it’s good, but I found it to be entertaining enough and most of the effects were pretty cool. And Gerard Butler was delightfully over the top. Not great, but harmless. 3/5
Gods Not Dead 2- AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! Just… AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! WHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Finding Dory- Lives up to the original phenomenally. The returning characters were all great, as were the new ones. Great animation, but that’s to be expected with Pixar. Had a lot of great laughs, as well as a lot of heartfelt moments. Was my favorite animated film of the year until I saw Moana, which I’ll get to later. 4.5/5
The BFG- 🎵Padding Padding Padding! Padding Padding Padding!🎵 The acting and characters were fine enough and the visual effects were okay at best, but the character development was, well, under-developed, and there’s a million things that are never explained. And it’s a really bad sign when the most interesting and funny moments are centered around fart jokes. This is one of those movie scenes that makes me feel like I would need to be drunk to enjoy it. 2/5 and that’s being generous.
Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders- Its not good but my word was it entertaining. There’s enough cheese in this to make the original Power Rangers tell them to try and tone it down. It’s so funny in how strangely self aware it is of how ridiculous the original Adam West Batman show was. Animation was good and the cast were clearly having a ball with this, especially the returning ones. What more can I say but “To the Crosswalk!” 3/5 What’s that? A sequel is coming with William Shatner voicing Two-Face? Oh Boy.
Moana- Fantastic and it got even better the more I thought about it. As I said, this topped Finding Dory as my favorite animated film of the year and I wish I’d gotten a chance to see it again in theaters. Disney is truly in a new Renaissance, especially with animated films. Animation, characters and voice acting were great, Auli’i Cravalho better get a ton of work after this, and the music was phenomenal. Favorite number was Dwayne Johnson singing “You’re Welcome”. Who knew he couldn’t just act but also sing pretty well. 5/5
La La Land- Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone had great chemistry, I’m starting to think I should’ve done a retrospective on the movies they’ve done together because they’ve done quite a few, and their singing was fantastic. Really glad Emma won best actress for this because this was her best performance to date. Two flaws however. One, while it is a musical, the opening number felt a little too out of nowhere, particularly because the main characters aren’t involved in it, even though we know they’re there. And second, without spoiling it, the ending makes no sense. Other than that, it’s great. 4.5/5
Assassins Creed- You know that feeling you get when you’re sick and it kinda hurts to move? That’s what I feel like this movie was going through. I can’t say I hated it, but I expected a lot more, especially given the cast and a pretty cool premise. If a sequel comes, I’ll see it, but I walked away pretty disappointed. 2.25/5
Hidden Figures- The cast was good and the film looked nice. While the racism does come off a bit cartoony, I think it works in the sense that that’s how the main characters see the people treating them the way they are. Perfectly entertaining, but I feel like it was only put on the Best Picture nominations list because they felt like they had to. 4/5
The LEGO Batman Movie- The cast is amazing, the animation is great and surprisingly even more fluent than the LEGO Movie. The action was surprisingly engaging and the comedy was brilliant. Not as good as the LEGO Movie, but still fantastic. Slight spoiler, but I find it annoying that they didn’t have Ralph Fiennes, who plays Alfred in the movie, voice Voldemort. 4.5/5
Beauty and the Beast(2017)- The cast was brilliant, the set design and visual effects were astonishing and the music was great, even if a couple of the numbers did feel like they went on a little too long. My only other issue regards Madame Garderobe. How do I put this correctly… Her design is TERRIFYING! I feel lucky I didn’t have nightmares after I saw this. But other wise, it was fantastic and a worthy tribute to the 1991 classic.